January 22, 2004

Some days I'm grateful for the natural desire to learn that is ingrained in children. We haven't done much school this week. Yet, Reagan's still learning. He's been reading a lot, and I'm so impressed with the improvement that he's making. He's reading books that I don't think most first graders are reading. And he's enjoying it! Of course subject matter does count. The book about the little tugboat that gets lost on the Thames River in London is his current favorite.

I've come to the conclusion that I simply don't want to do anything other than homeschool. I don't mind if it's more difficult. I don't mind if people think I'm crazy. I have a son who listens to his mother. He plays with his 1 year-old sister and other smaller children (and doesn't think it's weird). He does his chores and accepts that as a normal part of being in a family. Maybe I'm all wrong. Maybe he's just a really good natured child and my being home with him has nothing to do with it. But I don't think so.

I've found that people have so many reasons for homeschooling. I know I have a whole slew of them. From the freedom to travel to California frequently, to the educational success, to the social graces, I just keep finding more and more that keeps us going. And Reagan is finding his own subjects that he's interested in studying. The excitement for learning is being fostered for him. He can make things his way, and express himself creatively. He's a happy little boy.

I know some things are all about me. For instance, my son isn't being called names every day. He truly believes in his own worth. He knows that his basic existence is important to people. In kindergarten the insults had already begun. Reagan didn't understand it. Hopefully he'll avoid years of insults. If I went to a job every day where I was put down, I'd get a new job! But so many people expect their children to endure that as a "rite of passage." No thank you.

I suppose I'm extra contemplative tonight. My friend has gone into the hospital to deliver her baby today. Baby Grace is only 20 weeks along and she's only measuring 16 weeks. Grace will not survive past delivery. But my friend will be okay. Grace could not have survived no matter how long she was carried. Her condition is incompatible with life. And since mom's health was at risk, she's got to come now. Please pray for them. Their grief is strong, and shared by many.

I myself have just had too long to sit and think. Not to mention I'm incredibly hormonal and the drugs make me more emotional than usual. But we're doing fine. The contractions are still coming, but far enough apart to be safe. Keep us in your prayers, too.