March 2, 2004

The girls (I love writing that! I have girls! Plural!) both had appointments with the Pediatrician today. Bridget needed her two week check up and Piper needed a follow up for her pneumonia. Bridget has gained back her birth weight and is now 6 lbs. 13 oz. and Piper's lungs are clear. I informed the Dr. that I was the mom who didn't want to bring in the jaundiced baby. I think she felt much more comfortable after meeting me and talking with me. She said the girls are in perfect health, and I don't stink as a mom. Yay, me!

I suppose that I will soon have to start thinking about returning to work. Dominic has done such a great job taking care of things, but we really need my income again. My working 3 days a month more than pays for our grocery bill. I just hate even thinking about leaving the kids. I love what I do, but my first and best job is being a mom, and I doubt that there could ever be a job that I would be happy to leave my kids for. I thank the Lord that I only have to leave them with Daddy.

Piper is really learning the art of the temper tantrum. I had to put her in her crib 3 times this evening to let her calm down after she hadn't gotten her way and began crying and screaming. She didn't like being left in her crib. I think this will be very successful after she sees that I really will keep putting her there. I don't like temper tantrums. But I didn't yell or get frustrated. I just calmly put her in her crib and promised to come back when she'd calmed down. Then, once she'd calmed down I promptly returned. We'll see.

I sometimes thing parenthood is a big experiment. Not a great scientific one, though. It takes years and years to get the results, and you can't duplicate them. It feels at times that I'm walking through an obstacle course blindfolded. I'm just hoping that by walking a steady course I wont run into anything or hurt anyone.

It is wonderful that despite feeling blind, and sometimes stumbling through parenthood, Our God walks before me clearing and straightening the path. And when I'm about to fall he holds out his hand and catches me. What a reassuring thought.